"THISCLOSE" to being a BIG sister!

Maddie,

So much has happened in the last month.  We are now Chicagoans!  The house in St. Louis was packed the day before Thanksgiving and Daddy and I drove to Chicago from St. Louis the day after St. Louis while you stayed with Uncle Shawn and Aunt Nancy and were then delivered to us by plane by Mimi and Markie two days after Thanksgiving.

It's been tough to be 8 months pregnant, get our family moved in and comfortable and get you adjusted to a new life without being able to explain much to you.  I try but you are too little to understand.  I've given up my career but I'm finding that my bond with you has grown so much that it's been more of a reward than a problem.  For the last month you and I have been all each other has here in Chicago during the days.  We talk a lot, play a lot and spend nearly 100% of our time together.  Our bond has increased and that is something I didn't expect and have been pleasantly surprised by.  I never even thought our bond could be stronger, but it is.

Monday through Fridays are spent with a routine of sorts.  As much of one as I can have for you.  I've been trying to get you out and about to play in different play cafe's and visiting schools, etc.  It's cold so the options are extremely limited.   We wake up, have breakfast, figure out what we are going to do that day and go until lunch time when we usually come home (except for an occasional stop at Wendy's because you love their chicken nuggets and fries and I am always craving their hamburgers and frosties) and go down for a nap.  In the afternoon we usually play around the apartment and start dinner while waiting for Daddy to come home.  So far we have visited the aquarium, explore and much more ( a play room), little beans(another play room), the exploratorium (another playroom), we go to parks, go on walks, and very often we go to Target which you have come to love.  You ride in the "Maddie cart" which is this enormous cart meant for people with three kids or bigger kids.  My Maddie rides in it all by herself and is just happy as a little clam watching the store go by.  I very often will give you something to hold onto because you are such a good girl.  A little treat or something to have you focus on while you pass the time by and I shop.  To date you have come home with a "wee wee" ornament for your Christmas Tree, a Miss Kitty toothbrush, Goldfish crackers and more.  I even had a Mother say to her child right in front of us "why can't you just sit in your cart calmly like that good little girl?"  I beamed with pride.  My Maddie is a good girl!

Well, as I type this it is New Years Eve.  Daddy is making a standing rib roast and wild rice for dinner and my heart sinks because you are in St. Louis with Mimi.  I woke up Christmas morning very sick and the day after Christmas I went to my scheduled OB appointment and was sent to the Women's Hospital to get my breathing checked out.  They monitored your little sissy and myself while I tried a new inhaler.  You were at home with Daddy's friend Emily.  It turned out I had a viral infection which was complicating my asthma.  I was so sick that night and the next day I decided take Mimi up on her offer to come to Chicago and get you and fly back to St. Louis.  So here I sit on New Years Eve, without my Maddie and I miss you so much.  I was hoping the baby would come while you are in St. Louis but my body isn't showing any signs of wanting to deliver a baby so I believe I will see you Friday when you arrive with Mimi in Chicago.

I love you so much Maddie.  My heart is ready to expand to welcome your new baby sister but it is saddened a bit to think that my "only" baby, my "only" child will soon be an "older" sister.  You're going to be such a great big sister and I can't wait to watch you and your sister grow.  Whatever disagreements the two of you have, whatever differences you have, nothing is so big or worth so much that it should ever come between the two of you.  Respect each others differences and agree to disagree.  No matter what, love each other, support each other and always be there for each other.

I love you Maddie.  You will always be my baby.

Love,
Mama